i have a feeling he has a nice dick. i can just sense it.
She told me I was starting to look like a mermaid with herpes and I needed to stop it.
I think i found my new favorite workout. Go to a party where you dont know anybody and constantly walk around the house so you dont look awkward standing alone. im up to 1.8 miles
clearly I should have checked to see if he was an NRA member before I went back to his house and woke up in Heston's haven.
Her eyes are really red like she jus got out of the hospital and shes coughing ...80 ppl at her school do have swine flu dude
So your saying just a blow job?
Just made a drug deal by throwing my money to my dealers window and receiving weed the same way. We are the definition of typical lazy stoners.
As it turns out, drunk trust falling that guy at the top of the waterslide didn't really work out for anyone..
explaining to a nurse how i all most cut my finger off playing beer pong, she def just hand me a AA booklet.
I told the hostess, two bouncers and a manager i was roofied and made them smell my beer. Turns out I just picked up some stupid bitches CHERRY WHEAT beer by mistake. I insisted they replace my lost beer.
This is why i like single justin better. my only regret is not being present for more of his short life. may he rest in peace
He is just lying there. People are throwing money onto his chest as they walk by...
Remember when I peed in the trash can in the ATM room last night?
Never thought I'd say this, but thank god for my blackouts.
Hey mom, soo do we have a family lawyer or am I on my own for that?
Thank you, my gorgeous heroine, for being such a total life-saver by giving me rides, forcing me to eat, providing porous absorbant surfaces to bleed on, and everything else you do <3
conclusion: canadians have really freaky sex
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