i jus pukd everywherw but i took a showr, come cuddle
hooking up with chicks might be the way to go after all. walk of shame looks better in her clothes.
Since you didn't call me back last night, I can only assume that in 9 months you're going to have a child that I'm going to refer to as, "Daddy's little mistake in Miami."
somehow writing 'not a skank' on yur boobs doesn't really make you look less skanky...
Ok, let's play "if you were a slut" again and try and retrace our steps last night..
Am I undercharging for one hour of sex per essay? I need a serious business answer.
Just ignore his excessive use of exclamation points and be happy this one is of age.
You fucker.
I'm going to smoke the pathetic stems and miscellaneous particles that weren't good enough for all my other bowls because its all I have left. This is my bag's Rudy moment.
Btw kudos to your tongue last night. Sorry about that lady jizz in your beard.
I just did the walk of shame..with a blanket and a cup that says i will out drink all you bitches. This was not how i pictured 25.
Within the span of 10 minutes, I managed to make a slip 'n slide on his stomach, threatened to pee on him, kneed myself in the eye, and almost fell asleep on the toilet....in that order.
Your brother slept on my deck. There was a key under the mat. Relapse party success.
My bank account got hacked so he showed up with a 6 pack wearing a superman cape to cheer me up and you question why I love him?
I'd marry him just to keep his penis in the country
I woke up on a different floor than I went to sleep on. Can't find my shoes.
Randomize
