Texts From Last Night

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  (949): View more from California

  After going down on me he either said "there, it's over" or "there's an odor"... I couldn't hear him and was too embarrassed to ask him to repeat himself. I just got dressed, grabbed my bag, and left. So I don't think there's gunna be a second date. =(

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  (949): After going down on me he either said "there, it's over" or "there's an odor"... I couldn't hear him and was too embarrassed to ask him to repeat himself. I just got dressed, grabbed my bag, and left. So I don't think there's gunna be a second date. =( http://tfl.nu/pv1c
  Replies (43) Good night (585) Bad night (5318)
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  (765): View more from Indiana

  just saw the guy i hooked up with last nights' face on a billboard. win.

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  (765): just saw the guy i hooked up with last nights' face on a billboard. win. http://tfl.nu/bjq4
  Replies (17) Good night (8924) Bad night (835)
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  (215): View more from Pennsylvania

  We should never set our expectations higher than pizza bagels cause then our night is bound to get better

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  (215): We should never set our expectations higher than pizza bagels cause then our night is bound to get better http://tfl.nu/6zww
  Replies (9) Good night (4096) Bad night (719)
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  (215): View more from Pennsylvania

  Plus apparently whenever one of her friends loses their virginity they get a party with a funfetti cake which I found funny

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  (215): Plus apparently whenever one of her friends loses their virginity they get a party with a funfetti cake which I found funny http://tfl.nu/iixy
  Replies (22) Good night (5726) Bad night (901)
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  (661): View more from California

  new rule: cockblock me if I have had over a fifth of jack. no matter what.

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  (661): new rule: cockblock me if I have had over a fifth of jack. no matter what. http://tfl.nu/4g32
  Replies (27) Good night (5530) Bad night (1388)
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  (980): View more from North Carolina

  You two kept repeating the same thing over and over. It was like looking after retarded pull-string dolls.

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  (980): You two kept repeating the same thing over and over. It was like looking after retarded pull-string dolls. http://tfl.nu/1jxr
  Replies (12) Good night (1973) Bad night (3114)
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  (404): View more from Georgia

  YOU GOT KICKED OUT OF FIVE GUYS LAST NIGHT FOR THROWING PEANUTS AT THE PEOPLE WHO WORK THERE?!

  (678): View more from Georgia

  correction: escorted out

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  (404): YOU GOT KICKED OUT OF FIVE GUYS LAST NIGHT FOR THROWING PEANUTS AT THE PEOPLE WHO WORK THERE?! (678): correction: escorted out http://tfl.nu/gkul
  Replies (23) Good night (5187) Bad night (910)
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  (508): View more from Massachusetts

  If everything I've heard is true, then she's lost her virginity three times

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  (508): If everything I've heard is true, then she's lost her virginity three times http://tfl.nu/rglo
  Replies (7) Good night (2953) Bad night (779)
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  (425): View more from Washington

  WHY ARE YOU POKING HOLES IN MY 3AM LOGIC?!

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  (425): WHY ARE YOU POKING HOLES IN MY 3AM LOGIC?! http://tfl.nu/ccm6
  Replies (7) Good night (2499) Bad night (992)
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  (970): View more from Colorado

  I'm just pissed at the whore who takes over my body when I'm blacked out.

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  (970): I'm just pissed at the whore who takes over my body when I'm blacked out. http://tfl.nu/m1u8
  Replies (8) Good night (2084) Bad night (1075)
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  (405): View more from Oklahoma

  In other news, shitting yourself is not an acceptable way to start a Thursday.

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  (405): In other news, shitting yourself is not an acceptable way to start a Thursday. http://tfl.nu/wcjj
  Replies (6) Good night (496) Bad night (1378)
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  (416): View more from Toronto

  I feel bad for her, but I feel like she's one of those resource-raping alien civilizations that visits planets, decimates them and then leaves. Those really aren't the qualities I appreciate in a friend. Ya know?

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  (416): I feel bad for her, but I feel like she's one of those resource-raping alien civilizations that visits planets, decimates them and then leaves. Those really aren't the qualities I appreciate in a friend. Ya know? http://tfl.nu/vw9n
  Replies (12) Good night (592) Bad night (910)
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  (310): View more from California

  Guess whose hungry like a hippo: this bitch.

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  (310): Guess whose hungry like a hippo: this bitch. http://tfl.nu/am85
  Replies (3) Good night (776) Bad night (272)
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  (425): View more from Washington

  Option 1: fuck me and bedtime. Option 2: come fuck me and then hangout with everyone. Option 3: don't fuck me in which case fuck you.

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  (425): Option 1: fuck me and bedtime. Option 2: come fuck me and then hangout with everyone. Option 3: don't fuck me in which case fuck you. http://tfl.nu/jvnn
  Replies (3) Good night (1347) Bad night (221)
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  (706): View more from Georgia

  We got hammered last night and I woke up this morning with texts from 'iron maiden chick.' wtf?

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  (706): We got hammered last night and I woke up this morning with texts from 'iron maiden chick.' wtf? http://tfl.nu/g95k
  Replies (7) Good night (427) Bad night (187)

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