38 yer olds are good kisserssss
my goal in life is to wake up with my underwear on
I woke up to a paper award certificate for best blow job and he was gone. You're welcome mystey man.
So we are lighting beer bottles on fire and breaking them in half to make glasses
That sounds dangerous
Don't worry......were wearing oven mits.
I don't remember much but I think I'm wearing your underwear, and for that, I am extremely grateful.
I'm just saying. If this how my magic vagina shows it's magic then I don't want any
Your text makes more sense read in reverse.
We made out a little and then he gave me some weed. I would say it was a pretty productive stop on my way home
We need to get stoned and watch Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles 2. This has become a priority. Schedule accordingly.
So this is completely apropos of nothing, but I have a feeling that a friend of mine might be a good match for you. Can I set you two up on a date? Oh, and it seems that we live a block away from each other and aren't having sexy times. This is ridiculous. By the way, there's a chance that I might be a tad drunk. Still though, there's a very *good* chance that you and Mr. X would get along.
You got me 4 pizzas and i just saw this. I'm too drunk for this shit. I just yelled "4 pizzas holy shit!" At the pizza dude
He was awful. Hubby's was apparently epic. I suck at swinging.
So I think my motto should be "losing bras and dignity every weekend" but like in a really amazing way
Fuck him and his perfect arms, huge penis and relentless ability to ignore me.
I tried making my own red bull with crushed up caffeine pills, bubbley water and flintstones chewable vitamins. The ER doctor sead I'm lucky to be alive.
Randomize
