were doing shots for every snowflake that hits the ground
Either seal the deal or get out of the room, I don't want to hide in this closet anymore
id like to know how you successfully locked me in your backseat last night
You need to get here now. Before they realize I'm not puerto rican.
we hotboxed my bathroom. with nine people and two dogs.
The secrurity code on my debit card is 420, can not lose this card.
Just so we're clear. I'm still making jello shots and bringing them to the bar in my purse. I don't care if its half off margaritas. Don't want anyone thirsty
Boys DO look like their dicks. Its like dogs.
This weekend i learned three things 1) skittles in vodka is good 2) it takes more than a roll of quarters to get a cab home 3) never tell a bartender to give you your change in actual change
Kyle's mobile fuck service..... Kinda has a nice ring to it don't you think??
NATIONAL GIVE A BOSTON COP A BLOW JOB BITCH ROAD TRIP NOW
You're too young to have this sort of Grizzled Old Drunk In Roadside Bar wisdom.
I don't care who you bring as long as they are fun and not a cop
sexting just seems like too much work right now.
It's National Whipped Cream Day, prep those nips
Randomize
