The streak lives on, still havent been to Towson without throwing up
I just sneezed and had an orgasam..THAT turned on
He bought me shots at the bar as his way of of paying me back for Plan B
He put used condom on the handle of the plunger in the bathroom.
Think they will judge us if our pre drink is a kiddie pool of jello shots?
She was shaking her boobs and I was so high all I could think was "breast maracas"
Just remembered when I bought that round of shots I told the girls to "get their whore friend" who was making out with her bf instead of drinking. I don't know why they stayed.
I have a broken liver
I see that the whole "let's take a break from drinking" has worked out really well for us.
Just found an unopened tied g of coke on the floor in her room... she thinks the maintenance guy dropped it earlier today. This takes the cake for sketchiest apartment.
If I wasn't stoned and knee deep in cheese and crackers I'd help.
I threw up through my nose tonight. Happy cinco de mayo
"I'm not drinking any more tonight." As I dipped my quesadilla in a shot of tequila....then eats it
My vagina cried when he left. I think she's about to be at war with my self respect.
we need to open a bar. a bar with... wait for it... A FUCKING BALL PIT.
LOL. Do you guys need a ride home?
No. we're home already. i just thought it was a brilliant fucking idea.
The expiration date on my 40 is the same day as my 21st birthday
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