69 |D_O
wtf does that mean??
it's a very specialized emoticon, means 'i heard you fucking some dude through my bedroom wall last night and so i listened intently"
I'm torn. Shes everything I ever wanted, but I just cant get past the story about having drunken sex with her dog in high school.
Ughh on my way to the bathroom now... literally just puked on myself and cleaned it off with a hot dog bun... I love tailgate
On a scale of 1 to 10 how hot is the girl you're about to fuck?
Strong 6
That's an oxymoron.
Yes, she gives me platonic blowjobs as part of our friendship.
Feeling better?
I can stand long enough to do the dishes finally. Been trying that all day.
my mom found me passed out in the kitchen floor with the Brita pitcher.. Happy Mothers Day
Seriously though, you almost tore my right nipple off.
I just took the soggiest of beer shits and all i have to eat is shredded cheese and more beer. I need an adult.
Im gonna get home and destroy this bag of chicken nuggets with my soul.
His gf just liked my changed relationship status. She's gonna shit bricks when she finds out he left her for me. Bless her little heart.
Stop studying come to the bar get drunk and help me figure out how to get home pretend there are commas in there someplace
Some guy just walked past the bus stop in a lab coat and with a samurai sword and case...
It's a family event: you have to drink. No way around it. Its the law.
I can't decide which is the most disgusting: emily having sex on the stairwell of a frat, michelle shaving her vagina with a razor she found in a frat bathroom, or me getting fingered on the dance floor by some rando. opinions?
Randomize
