sexting loses it's worth when you accidentally text your boss.
on the last problem of the exam i just drew a picture of a cat and left
I get drunk and say inappropriate things... you get drunk and sleep with inappropriate people. it's what we do.
Worst relationship ever. Keep in mind I've dated two married chicks and a Mormon.
i just remember sitting on this bed, naked, STILL WITH A CONDOM ON, and suddenly these random girls were in the room shouting at me
you started introducing us as kentucky and gentlemen
Fine then. I'll just do all this coke on my own this weekend and die. It'll be strictly your fault.
98% is good enough for me. Kinda like birth control. Worth the risk
dude Steve you don't even know. its just been one hairy asshole after another.
I just closed two deals on my laptop from my bathroom while smoking a bowl, like a bawssss. Working from home is my favorite.
I'm trying to get WebMD to diagnose me with a hangover
MEG JUST LICKED A DRAIN PIPE. DAVE PUNCHED MATT IN THE THROAT. ALL BOUNDARIES ARE DOWN. I REPEAT. ALL BOUNDARIES ARE DOWN.
Also he said my vagina was sculpted by gods so there must be some feelings here.
my life is turning into trapped in the closet at way too fast a speed for me to feel comfortable.
My mom and my boss just had a discussion on FB about the sexual habits of old people. The magic of the Internet.
Randomize
