I'm still reeling over the fact that you beat us all at Risk while you were flat on your ass drunk and falling asleep on South America.
so the plumber came, he found condoms, feathers and glitter in the pipes.
It's a line of coke at 10 a.m. kind of Saturday. Don't be a pussy about life.
You have to stop getting hammered and preaching about that mission trip to Haiti.
id say bad/good trip...at first I wanted to claw off my skin... but then when i tried i ended up tickling myself for an hour.
Glow parties are what I live for
Your priorities in life astound me
I just peed in a flower pot on the veranda while crying and holding a drink
Nothing like grinding all night with a hot ethnic guy dressed as a clown to help conquer your phobia. Halloween is fucked up.
I saw a guy do a line this morning in line to start the 5k, happy thanksgiving!
okcupid is pretty much insisting i hook up with this chick who looks like andy milonakis.
Well, you're 18 and dating a 28 year old. Who has a wife. Who isn't you. I would guess that's why your mom frowns upon the relationship.
I went out with a plan. I came home with a Brian. THIS WAS NOT PART OF THE PLAN.
he's been 21 for 38 minutes and he's already trying to fist fight this dude over his girl
awwwww babys first drunken mistake
he took a fucking pitcher of koolaid and vodka to the bath with him... i wake up from my blackout to his roomate screaming cause he spilled it and passed out in the middle of a blood red tub. she thought he killed himself. jesus christ its only the first day of break and i already regret coming home
I called him the wrong name all night, yet I still got a ride home from the party and hooked up with the guy. I'm irresistible.
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