I am about to get in a knife fight over a corn dog.
he told us the story of how he fought ketchup, mustard, and thomas the train engine all in one night. if that doesn't sound like an acid trip i dont know what does.
i just did my hair and make up to walk our dogs.. I hate being the single roommate
I feel like Captain Blackout doesn't do her justice. Brigadier General Blackout is much better.
They reenacted the scene from the lion king where mufasa talked to simba from the clouds. As high as they were they got it word for word. There has to be an award for that.
HOW LONG TILL THESE DRUGS WEAR OFF. I WORK IN ONE HOUR, I REPEAT, I WORK IN ONE HOUR.
Using a 12 year old as a wingman. Does that make me a bad person?
Just got offered bathroom sex. I've never been more flattered.
Yeah, it was all very half-hearted. In the middle of sex we both just stopped and looked at each other and said, "can we just sleep instead?"
That is so sad.
There's no such thing as shame in your world, is there?
I'm covered in bite marks and have a cracked rib - was a good weekend
The clothing optional portion of the night began around midnight. Then we did disgusting things to each other. It was beautiful.
I discovered moonshine and fell in love.
thanks for not wanting to stay all night or talk or anything, nice to have a fuck buddy who really doesnt take the buddy part serious
I'm all about the fuck
i shit you not. the flight is delayed because they have to change fucking light bulb. all the airport bars are closed and my shit is in checked luggage.
Randomize
