So its not gay if you have sex with another woman and its academic
so what if I'm having sex with a woman for recreation?
Thats gay
You just kept saying over and over "Tell me I won't do it." Someone finally told you you won't. You did. Welcome to herpes.
I only want to screw him when I'm drunk. Problem is I try to be drunk as often as possible
i was so worried that when his hands were down my pants he was going to find the weed i stole from him
also: i found my "nug jug", actually the baby did, but either way it got returned to its rightful owner
Uggh answer your phone, you are the only one I know who'll be proud of what I woke up next to this morning .
This hot topless Jamaican just ran down the st with me on his back and He was screaming "I be stealing yo white ladies."
I don't know if i should be jealous or worried... or question where you are.
You just sat there and yelled "I JUST WANT TO RUB MY NIPPLES"
how sketchy is it to eat a candy wrapped in masking tape from reggae night? because we totally just split it...
We got back from the bar and started watching bizzare foods, which subsequently led to the consumption of large amounts of rancid lunch meat and small insects.
For graduation he gave me roses, a giraffe necklace, and a butt plug. I think this might be my one shot at true love
In other news, I'm pretty sure my mom was encouraging me to have a threesome yesterday... I don't even want to start digging in that garden of horror and trauma.
Sex obviously provides more sustenance than oatmeal.
Have you ever got so drunk that you tasted the future?
I swear to god if you keep eating my cats food drunk I am going to kick you out of our apartment.
Randomize
