Eric got herpes from Jo-ann
That's what he deserves for hooking up with a french canadian
She said she could kiss it, just not put it in her mouth. Because that would be cheating..
He was drunk at Denny's at 5 am saying how Dear John was the worst movie he has ever seen... eyes filled with tears.
I made friends with a raccoon. I pet it. Like I was Pocahontas.
Let's just say, at one point i got woken up at 4am by a naked guy who was offering me steak, in a cup.
She just licked her nipple in public to get a free bar tab.
... why is there a bottle of pee on my headboard?
I can't let him end my perfect streak. HE USED TO BE FAT
He did a line of coke off my stomach then flipped me over and smacked my ass. Then, while he was talking dirty to me, he told me he wanted to hire someone to clean my room. And that's when he lost his boner. Life is so hard.
Hella random but just hear me out...A bar that is a petting zoo. Bitches love petting zoos.
Don't remember anything. Melissa just said I kept saying welcome to the bat cave
i feel like ive seen the light, but not in the nasty christian way. thats gross. say no to jesus, kids
yeah we're all naked, and I think we just shaved Chad.
i told her we had a class about unicorns together. i'd say it was a good night
Only you could get too drunk for taco bell. I don't know if I'm jealous or ashamed. Go to bed.
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