I'm half single.
Please tell me it's the bottom half.
Life lesson: when driving and throwing up, choose a paper bag over plastic. Fuck my life.
What should i be more turned off about... his massive collection of condoms or that he asked me to sign my name by number 68 on the list posted on his wall?
I think the two go hand in hand.
Those balls look pretty dangerous.
Right when I walked into the party my boyfriend stood up and yelled, "HEY TITS, GET ME A BEER!"
no seriously. she's even got the premier of the real L word on her calendar at work. that lesbian.
at some point i feel off my bar stool straight into the arms of a gay guy. just my luck.
How is it possible that I am in a completely different city, and there are 2 dudes here that I've banged? How????
Come get her ASAP. She's "people bowling," which is just her rolling into random groups of people. People look pissed.
whose ass print is on the piano?
well i mean she can't stop a weed based friendship...its like a trying to stop a bomb or a really fast train...
sex on the stairs. not our finest idea.
Dude, I danced with Abe Lincoln! How could last night have been any better???
It's National Whipped Cream Day, prep those nips
I'm listening to a women in metal station and wearing a flannel. I may have approached peak lesbian.
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