Far right against the wall..hiding come find me. dont tell oyhers hahaha
Did you know nanny-cams work just as well for recording that blow job on the sofa?
yeah that always happens. i'm like the where's waldo of parties. i never even know where the fuck i'm at.
As girls, Bert & Ernie are not very bangable costumes. At least not by who we'd want to get banged by.
I was kidding. But I promise you I'd still find us the most eligible bangables, even if we dressed up like a dumpster and a prom night baby.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Two words that describe last night: naked and backflips.
He equated my biology degree to a belief in Santa. I wonder if he heard the doors to my vagina clanging shut.
I think we need to have a day of drinking in classes. I know we don't share any, but sacrifices need to be made.
I just want to have beer shits in my own bathroom. Is that too much to ask for?
in that moment our bushes were one. and in that moment we were pure.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She told me I should be proud of my dick pics, then told me she was in love with me, then I dropped her off at her boyfriend's. I was a new kind of failure tonight.
I'm going to reward myself for having sex with coffee and a breakfast burrito.
Oh yeah I meant to tell you the Tomb Raider looking girl so crop dusted me on the stairway
The playlist was "songs to sing in the shower". I literally got fucked to Footloose.
you would not believe who i just fucked on my lunch break
Why do so many fanfic writers want to see hockey players get pregnant?
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