I'm afraid that if I tell my sister I think Zachary Quinto is gay I'll have to put her on suicide watch for the next week or so
happy early fathers day!!!
im not a father
about that...
Note to all middle aged "I totally let myself go after childbirth" frumpy mothers: I do not dress this way for your husbands. Stop looking at me like that. It's not my fault.
soooo we both peed the bed last night...
I woke up to a paper award certificate for best blow job and he was gone. You're welcome mystey man.
just found the land before time on youtube... I'm so fucked for finals
Climbing onto the roof in a dress and high heeled boots was probably not the best idea, especially after all that Bacardi.
You told the waitress last night "What tip bracket do I have to be in to see your boobs"
At least you got a round of applause for dancing like vanilla ice across the street and into the bar. Even as you were getting carded
If someone made a breakfast cereal that was a cross between lucky charms and fruity pebbles and called it unicorn power with a huge fucking rainbow and a unicorn standing in a pot of gold on the box, they would be rich. Not only monetarily but spiritually as well...
I'm scared because his knowledge of star trek is turning me on
at one point, you reached into your purse, pulled out a tampon, and proceeded to rub it on your lips like chapstick... that drunk
we f'd six times
f'd?
its sunday, i cant say fucked
I flashed my boobs, shit my pants, and kissed the wrong twin. I'm on a roll you don't want in on.
How is there a hawk inside this house? More importantly how the hell is he handling it without any gear?
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