and pubic hair rears its ugly head again
I projectile vomited into my sink. Jealous?
Kind of. My puke would have just dribbled down my chin and missed the sink completely.
Ohh that happened after I started to cry.
I made out with the bride. You tell me how my night was
She cried. My mom screams. And nut went everywhere. It was all around a bad situation.
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We should probably avoid doing this again, but hey it was a nice one time thing to tell the grandkids about... Hopefully they don't end up being YOUR grandkids.
Watching Fresh Prince at 9am with a beer in hand and he just said to Uncle Phil "Sometimes I worry that I'll never get my life together." I feel like that was a sign from above or something
No big deal, we were just two friends having sex. It's perfectly normal we don't remember. Water under the sex bridge,
I'll be honest with you, my dick was out at that point in time.
It was perfect I came I passed out in his comfortable bed then a glass of jack Daniels fell from the bed post and spilled all over my face
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OMG bikini contest at the bar. You can see this one chicks scar from her c-section and I'm pretty sure she is the best of the bunch.
My mouth tastes like what I imagine a hobo's skin would taste like.
I beer bonged before it even hit 4 o' clock. Please get on my level homecoming style.
I drank beer out of some sort of animal horn all night, then we fucked to a "viking metal" album. I feel like I should go pillage something to complete the Norse trifecta.
i just want to die with dignity and clean teeth, is that too much to ask?
The night's not a success unless at least 60% of participants wake up with bite marks on their genitals the next morning.
I don't know what kind of parties you go to, but we should hang out more often.
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