she's basically destroyed all of the faith i had that skinny blond girls could be a functioning part of society.
I'm watching a Sinbad stand up special. Not even drugs can make this funny.
Telling me that I would make a great "occasional fuck" was not appreciated.
just saw someone in just a bathrobe not even tied shut run to the bathroom with a facefull of cum. Someone had a good night
And I kind of want to stare at skinny jonah hill like a weird zoo exhibit lol.
Yeah. I had to take off my shirt. It's soaked in weakness.
Watching videos from last night and u go "I should be the president, I can get whatever I want w my tits"
New rule: I am no longer allowed to speak
I truly just stopped puking in my 730 am calculus class, looked up, corrected my professor, then resumed puking my eyes out. He was both impressed and disgusted.
Nah I think he's a bit weirded out I worked out where he lives from a Facebook photo
He has a beach house and a Simba tattoo. Our wedding is next Tuesday, hope you're free.
I'm trying to find a place to hide weed in my mother in law's house...
Married life problems?
I don't know what that means. Any of it. BUT I will be at your house at 10:20 and you better be ready to get high as balls.
So congratulations, your penis has now sent me to urgent care not once, but twice!
I have to close one eye, because I don't wanna see two movies, I only want to see one.
hey. this is your former cousin. you boned my best friend last night.
Randomize
