told my boyfriend i was a virgin so he wouldnt feel bad since he is. now hes asking why his dick is so itchy. should i tell him why?
i don't see why you should, it's not like you told the other guys with the itchy dicks.
There's guys at my school running around throwing potatoes shouting "remember the famine." makes me proud to be Irish.
All i remember is people cheering me on to drink faster than the dog, out of the dog's bowl. I just couldn't stop.
I'll sleep on the bed... The couch is now designated banging area. Any banging performed outside of that area will be subject to fines of cleaning up stains.
I dont have any paper so I'm writing class notes on my first response direction pregnancy paper. Judging eyes are all around.
It's all good. The CSI guy came and I played the theme song while he in was in our place. The cops even laughed.
She who has the vag holds all the power. He will learn one way or the other.
Yeah, if you don't like strip clubs you won't like microwave chimichangas.
Forgot my sound was off and didnt even realize it until halfway through because I thought I could hear it. I think high me just narrated half a clip of adventure time
I didn't pay $79 for lingerie for you to cum in 30 seconds
I'm sitting in my car avoiding a customer. Apparently the new year hasn't affected my attitude nor work ethic
I'm not sure. I have to find the Greeks I was with last night and see if they can explain to me why I can't hear out of my right ear and why I look like I got the shit kicked out of me
This morning we had sex while he was wearing a full length fur jacket and sunglasses... I wasn't even phased
Grumpy Cat is dead and fuck EVERYTHING.
Do dollar stores sell vibrators?
Randomize
