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That's kind of creepy but I guess since I'm wearing your dad's pants nothing is off limits anymore
dude that girl has seen more cock ends then weekends
Just did a line with a monopoly bill. Tell me I'm not fancy.
I feel like a bad episode of csi trying to figure everyone's DNA that's in me
Im a photoshop master, i successfully reduced the size of the pupils of all the girls I made out last night with to prove they were not that drunk. So glad the camera goes home with me.
my ex gf has sooo many hot friends... i feel like im at a grocery store when on her fb... just shopping around.
You say "I'm in class" like it matters... I'm getting a little tired of having to smoke by myself at 4:20 because you're in class.
Fucking freshmen need to learn how to puke in the bushes outside the dorm and not in the fucking elevator.
Second day of summer classes and i already got this girl to send me nudes during class
that is WHY your in summer classes
worth it
I'm not sure what happened. But I must have won because I obviously stole two full pitchers of beer from the bar and taped a note on them saying "your welcome"
There's always one sober annoying person at a party. I hate responsible people. I just wanted to show everyone my nipples. There cute. She didn't have to stop me
Hey so I just want to get straight to the point it was me who ate the last cupcake and it was your sister who I fucked last nigt
In either case, seeing now as it's basically two couples, unless we're planning to have a good old fashion orgy I think this isn't going to work out so well.
Would "deck the halls with penises " be an appropriate event title? I know peni is the plural but flow of the tongue as well
I'm currently eating a turkey dinner, listening to xplosive by dr. Dre, and drinking rum. Hispanic christmas dinners are the best.
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