I just hope this isn't happening Final Destination style
Travis Barker would totally be Devon Sawa in this scenario
I took an adderall but just ended up meticulously arranging my farmville for hours
I woke up to them arguing over who would get my morning wood. Oh, and I was dressed as Santa.
i made it my goal to pee in the sink of every apartment we went to last night. i didnt use the toilet once
We need to either drink and not go to waffle house or go to waffle house and not drink. I need to know which is causing these shits.
Thanks for putting pants on me last night. And for calling me a princess.
Im drinking in homer but I guess Egan got arrestest on an "assault by water ballon" charge but tom actually threw the water balloon in question at the bartender.
it would be cheaper just to buy a dildo to intimidate people with.
I feel like I grabbed someones dick last night, & if I didn't I'll be disappointed in myself
my spring break was before theirs and i literally fed him vodka all week, only stopping for class and bowls. like handles. i cant even think anymore, that chastity belt was hard to get off,
He called his dick "The Beast" and said he lived "The Beast Life". He was pretty but it was better if he didn't talk.
his first act of 2015 was getting stabbed
Stop leaving buckets of wine at my house.
I am literally this close to screaming out my window if anyone nearby was down to fuck. I am too damn horny.
I threw up all of my purple drank and thats really important
Randomize
