weak ass sauce last night. waste of time. you suck. ps. your boobs are fake
I drank like a thousand beers last night and my poo is solid, not gross like usual. I think this means I've grown up.
do you ever facebook stalk someone so much you think their inside jokes are yours?
My drug dealer asked me out. What's the protocal for this?
Are they hot? And are the slutty? These are my concerns for any wedding. You say yes, and yes, I will be your best man
If I am going to throw out this whole "born again virgin" thing...i'm not going to do it on someone who is less than 5 inches.
Obviously he considers you not fucking him as fucking up. Thus making him fuck up. Based on this I believe he should be disqualified from the race to your vagina.
How do I know if porn I have watched is haunted?
She was to tired for head so she opted for a footjob with poor results. I dont want to talk about it
Do you still speak french? one of two girls I woke up with only speaks french...
Do they make liter beers?
They make 40s
Do they make 2 liter beers
They make 2 40s
apparently when she asked me how drunk I was on a scale of 1-10, I answered "bitch I'm fabulous" and tried to do a sassy hairflip. but I have short hair.
Not sure if your roommate speaks German while sleeping, or if she woke up, figured out we were fucking, and used German to swear at us.
I taught three men with PhDs how to make a gravity bong last night. I love academia.
Did he pick you up in a mini van?
Yes. Turns out my sugar daddy is about to be an actual daddy
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