Well I thought that next 8 ball would either kill us or turn us into Gods
You drink too much
No, I drink just the right amount - too often.
my ass just sighed. even my farts are tired.
It's a beautiful day for a hangover
i wish i could swallow nair and shit it out and it would get rid of all my ass hair.
he took off my shirt and said 'oh my god the legends are true'
Dont judge me. Him and his friends got me drunk for free, the least i could do was suck his dick
He made sure to throw up on the Mexico side of the border while we were in line at the check point. Then finished by screaming you an have it back. You can have it all back.
Somehow I feel more guilty using her razor then I do having sex with her boyfriend...
Also they do not have any come back to america, i miss my fuck buddy cards at Hallmark.
Girl it's 3:30 get your life together and come enjoy a bowl, some coffee and a brownie with me
Plus he is a pilot so I could give him flight dome
We're gonna have to check the security cameras after last night
Hows your mom
Shes good, she claims she wasnt drunk
You handed me your heels and said, "barefoot running is all the rage." Then you proceeded to run home.
Randomize
