hahaha Yeah oh well, she wrote on my facebook wall, That's almost like a digital hand job
if i died would you start the facebook group?
Grandma was not a fan of the beer-can ornaments. Not "traditional".
I guess you don't realize how much twelve bags of chips are, until they're all over your floor.
I just sent you a google doc listing all the reasons why I should stop hooking up with him. Feel free to add to it.
Hey remember that night when you sang Fergie to me? I think that's the exact moment in time when the thought "I could be faithful to this man" came into serious consideration.
I think my boss gives me work off weekends because he doesn't want me showing up hungover anymore..
I asked her if she could eat some Doritos so when we made out it would taste awesome
It's been awhile, you pregnant yet?
I'm at the back whiskey bar with a 7 and 7 in a winnie the pooh costume. Come find me.
I walked out ot my car in the morning thinking there was a sandwich I left there from yesterday. Then later that day I was checking the mail and saw the other side of my car :/
It concerns me the most that u were potentially going to eat a day old car sandwich.
We were high and the scary movies were scaring us too bad. Were all watching porn instead now
I regret nothing
Not even Married Dan?
I regret one thing
Upstairs definitely just had sex while I wrote you love poetry. That was a fun experience 🤷🏻♀️
I have a number of responses, ranging in content, tone, and maturity. Choose your destiny...
Remember when you laughed that I downloaded a “fireplace” station on my Roku? I just woke up butt naked on my couch with my fireplace station playing. So there, guess that shows you. Now excuse me while I go back to sleep in front of my fireplace.
Randomize
