his facebook status quotes britney spears so there is always that
guess you're going to miss out on a groin massage and a frosty vagina
We need a plan...
Find random men. Use them as sexual objects. There's our plan.
I just figured out, there are 9 children in this world that I can look at in the face and say "I fucked your mom."
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don't know why people felt they couldn't use the toilet with me passed out in the tub. I shut the curtain. It was like being in another room.
They wouldn't let me go to sleep at the police station while I was waiting to bail u out. YOU OWE ME
Although, I did get to see a Raiders fan and his toothless girlfriend get roughed up by the police and dragged out of the stadium. So the night wasn't a total loss.
Porn. Physics. Porn. Icecream. Porn. That's my life now.
I really really need to have and out of body experience just so I can talk to myself about this shit that I'm doing with my life.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
What happened with the girl wasn't a gay thing. It was just a mutual respect and want for sex. The guys just weren't there.
Call it what you want. You fucked a girl.
She's not a foreskin expert like you
I need to reevaluate. My boss gave me drug money. I overslept on my couch. And I had my student teacher go to McDonald's and get an egg mcmuffin for me.
I feel like shit, and I can't get the band aids off my nipples.
sending my old camp counselor nudes. childhood memory win or new low?
So after the absinthe shots_____(fill in the blank area for me please)......
Randomize