at some point to night u and I have a 'meeting' too...(1-737): I hope so
she won't take no for an answer... no matter what language i said it in
do you think you could subtly ask him about the dimensions of his penis?
Who's got a bloodstream full of margaritas by 2pm? Not you, that's for sure, because you've got one of those "real" jobs.
We are doing handstands and somersaults in the pool. With an inflatable beer pong table and our regular beer pong table. We're ponging by land and by sea
Best elective surgery ever. Having a great time ignoring girls' pleas to pull out and blowing it inside anyway. I like to watch them absolutely freak out and go batshit crazy for 20 mins before I mention the snip-snip surgery. Power trip.
This dude has my number from April last year. Drunk me left sober me a puzzle. No confirmation of pants off business
The sun is gonna brush it's hairy dick across my forehead in the morning, gently whispering: "you're 4 hours late for work"
I had not one but two drunk coworkers text me and hit on me tonight. I feel like I've finally been accepted into my dysfunctional workplace
i ended up eating cold sauceless spaghetti out of the container in the fridge with my hands.
umm, I just masturbated to old Justin timberlake on MTV jams. in need of dick ASAP
People will call it the Wrath of the Froyo. We'll be immortalized.
It hurts to hear and I can smell shapes.
I would really like it if you guys got out of my bush
are you the reason the first floor girls' bathroom smells like weed?
Randomize