we black-lighted her bedspread and it looked like a jackson pollock painting.
Totally just grabbed the wrong dick. Damn this tequila.
we are both sitting on my bed desperately refreshing the order tracking page for dominos.
I got kicked out of the bar but no one cared, I dont have any money so i stayed outside with the bouncer for an hour and he got so sick of me he let me back in on the condition that i cant leave my seat. VISIT ME
I put a toilet paper roll with my number on it by his face... hooking up is not happening
He tried to fight me not realizing that I work as a bouncer in the the same bar we were in. His night ended with him in handcuffs, missing teeth, PLUS I got his shots that he ordered since he didn't get to drink them.
Too high to move please buy hi-c and pour it in my mouth in exchange I will marry your first born child
My liver and I thought we knew what we signed up for. We were wrong.
So, we estimated there is at least 40 pounds of boob in our house.
I would rather burn my vagina off with a damn flame thrower before I would touch anything that has touched her skank ass.
I was able to hide the fact that I had just shit in my pants, and then wupped her ass at FIFA
By the way I got my period today. No NHL babies for me.
You live 7 mins away and I'm leaving in 10 mins. At this point sex before work is impossible.
Challenge accepted. Be naked in 6 mins.
dont know what thebfuxk is in rhat shit, but dont lemme have antmore
The work outs are working. Someone just said my body type was “Tits On A Stick”.
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