I can't find my pants or my car
I didn't even hookup I think I took them off at taco bell...
ha omg I always lose my dignity at taco bell as well... so no big deal.
Remember ______, girl, blonde, one of my roommates the first year of ________?
Yeah we hooked up in the top bunk bed while simultaneously having a conversation with u, so yeah, I remember her
You know if a vagina was a face, it'd be ugly as hell...
The only reason I kept his number in my phone for so long is so that hed pay for my abortion.
Ricky Martin is gay. You owe me $10 from 3rd grade.
I have tardy slips. and absent slips if you don't show up to the bar. and trust me, if you are absent there will be a saturday school. I'm teaching you how to drink tonight.
I almost lit my balls on fire tonight.
I punted my pants across my apt at my roommate last night. Everything else is kinda fuzzy.
My cat just smacked my blunt from my hand and then put her head in my hand. I don't know how to feel
Just threw up in the trash can at my desk. I guess "beating the hangover" eventually leads to this.
Keep in mind this was 2012... YOLO was a very new concept.
this periodpocalypse needs to be over. I need head
I don't care. We're going to fuck. And I WONT apologize in the morning. You cheated on me, so you can cheat on her with me.
Jello shots? I thought you weren't drinking tonight.
Im not drinking im slurping
School supplies are right next to the margarita mix at target. Its a sign
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