Seeya bye Latvian government! Whammy!
are you wasted or are you getting laid?
ebdebdebdebd
wow
Just saw the true definition of the muffin top and camel toe all on one person at the DC zoo... Tried to take a pic but she got away..
Just used my last prints at the library for brackets instead of final reviews. Hello March.
Just learned the hard way that dicks can bruise the back of your throat to the extent that you cant eat. You're dead to me.
you can SEE the outline of a pad through her jeans. there is no way
I've been living off of popsicles and broth.
He brought me bullshit flowers and a bullshit apology. Even shrek did more than that for Fiona. And he's an ogre. Does this not say anything about him?
And then he told me he just wanted me to hold his cock while we watched tv...
Dude you ate toast sprawled out on my kitchen floor and said "this is comfy". No more day drinking.
My chin is breaking out a bit and feels all itchy and burny like I'm allergic to something. Are you using a new lotion on your balls?
It really does creep me out though that the next ten years will involve my friends creating smaller versions of themselves because to be honest I don't know how much I like some of them. So that thought it really scary
WAKE THE EFF UP THE UBER DRIVER IS TRYING TO TAKE ME HOME
Man I sound like a slutty Mormon
B. I found a note on my phone and all it says is 'Fuck yeah im a racecar'
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