PS the last 3 guys I've hooked up with were a CEO, a mechanical bull operator and a magic the gathering player...I need a type...
Ur type is ready and willing
Ryan Ross and Jon Walker left panic at the disco today.
I predict a mass suicide of the 14 year old girl population...
He is drunkenly eating my teddy grahms and making little growling noises as he bites the head off of each one.
why do our vaginas work when we are blacked out?? it's just not fair.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
DUUUDE!! just found out that the fbi has a kids page. guess who's got a new jumior officer printout badge?
my voice of reason is faarrr too drunk for me to listen.
It smells like ranch
Must be all the white people
He stripped down to boxers and then started flinging jello shots with a spoon into people's mouths like a catapult.
It was like the titanic mixed with those sad puppy commercials mixed with jello shots
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
PROFESSOR JUST TOOK A SHOT WITH US BEFORE CLASS. WELCOME TO THE LAST DAY OF FINALS.
I tried getting kicked out of my favorite bar. No matter what I did, I could do no wrong
It's my birthday weekend! I'm getting a Brazilian and he's going to fucking Arkansas. Where the fuck are his priorities?
you put your dick on my shoulder this morning like it was a fucking parrot
Woman doing my Brazilian right now says to tell you she says hi...what has our life come to?
he's annoying when i'm sober but vaguely hot when i'm drunk so yes i do have a preference and it goes by the name of vodka
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