So remember when i bet you that girl uses dick to validate her existence?
...yea
She's valid.
And i generally try not to roofie people when I'm in a committed relationship.
I just sneezed and had an orgasam..THAT turned on
almost just walked around my whole building with my bowl in my hand before i remembered 420 isnt a get out of jail free card
just realized we made a drinking game to how many times they say "hakuna matata" in the lion king last night... hello sophomore year.
I feel choking has become trendy-- ita losing its effect. I may just have to go back to missionary to spice it up
I remember just enough about last night to wish I didn't remember anything.
It's times where you wake up in the hospital after trying to road surf that you wonder what you're doing in life.
We accept all of your sexual lovers, Jewish, episcopalian, atheist. Dick is dick
Like the fear of satan was put into my heart when I saw him put that sandwich on the WOODEN BENCH
It's situations like these that make me climb out of windows
Observations from Vegas: #1. Strippers pasties pose a choking hazard. #2. Best. Heimlich. Ever.
There is this guy in here. He didn't even get ice cream he just filled up his cup with mini marshmellows, chocolate syrup, about a lb of grahm cracker crumbs and walked around to everyone in the shop saying "hey, hey look here, I just made fucking s'mores." He was SO proud of himself.
he asked me why I let you steal the gnome, and you jumped out of the bathroom, yelled "you know why!" and ran outside with said gnome
We live walking distance from the coors factory. no, we do not have a dry week.
Randomize
