i'm in his bathroom *freshening up* and he not only has a hairdryer... but a straightener. get me out of here... NOW
I walked downstairs and there were 50 sorority girls. I wasn't expecting an audience during my walk of shame.
It's 8 am and he's already trying to get me to make out with a girl.
Horny girl and non horny girl have different views on life
I really hope he dies in a tragic kegstand mishap
being able to look good while almost puking is a skill that takes a lot of puking to develop.
i put his shirt in a ziplock bag to preserve his smell
please tell me you are kidding me
im honestly just eating salsa and looking at his penis
I refuse to have another spring break doomed by pregnancy.
It was awesome explaining why I had a tiger with boxers in my bed, a little bit drunk, to a girl in a pre-sex moment
I'm pretty sure we organized our beer pong teams according to who's been circumsized...
Hot Damn Cinnamon Schnapps make me feel like the sun is punching me in the face and a bear is sleeping inside me.
NO TEQUILA
Why do I always think it's a good idea? Like a challenge? Shit maybe I should CHALLEGE myself to get laid for once instead
Don't masturbate while listening to Pandora. Just came during a buffalo wild wings commercial and I feel really weird about it.
So if you wanna come get your pants you can. But you have to come in your boxers. Rules are rules!
Randomize
