A moment of silence for all our pussy whips bro's who had to endure the NEW MOON premier!
Omg i either met the gayest dude ever or my next boyfriend
my financial goal is to have my cable back before football season starts
This is the last pregnancy scare i've had since i was 12 and i thought you could get pregnant from masturbating.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
When his Irish accent comes out my uterus hums. Or some productive organ down there, I'm not sure of the logistics
Why doesn't he get that I would rather give him blow jobs than be in a relationship?
Something about Sunday night screams phone sex
Bjs and tacos. That's my life.
75% of my food budget goes to wine, the rest to chips and salsa.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I may be a feminist, but I am not above using my body to distract you if it means I might beat you in a game of scrabble.
NO HE PUT HIS HAND IN HIS PANTS BEFORE HE TOUCHED THE BONG.
ILLEGAL
You should have just fucked me in the bathroom when you had a chance!
Hey do you care to explain why there are 3 empty pickle jars next to me when I woke up or do I even wanna know?
So apparently my bro is going to make me fix his tattoo this trip... He sent me a pic of said tattoo. Tattoo is of a sperm, on his penis, which was in a woman's mouth... Wth
He expects a blow job at the movies but won’t pay for popcorn? Does he know it’s not 2017 anymore
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