I just woke up in the 4th floor lounge at 5:30AM with my ipod on to springsteen and a condom on
I just cut my nipple shaving
My bracket is officially just a list of teams that lost.
do you guys have 30-35 shot glasses? because if not, i don't even see a point in me coming
well you decided to make everyone "drinks" which was sprite and beer mixed.
whoever set the energy saving light timer in the lobby bathroom cleraly has no concept how long a work dump takes
shes still here... layin in my bed watching a beyonce concert on tv drinking leftover franzia straight outta the bag and crying
I could of sworn you were praying in the strip club.
Just don't eat pie out of the sink. It's a real blow to the self esteem.
That birthday blow job you ordered came in the mail today. I suggest you hurry home.
Bro you fell face first into the sand and then balled up into the fetal position and yelled help untill I picked you up, no more whiskey for you...
When I watch porn and jerk off like 95% of the time Iron Chef is on in the background...
Sometimes you just gotta get high and go to a planetarium. Why can't he understand that?
I did crash a prom last night though.. It was fun
Did you have a good sleep?
if a good sleep includes waking up cuddling a bottle of wine I had a GREAT sleep
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