ive never been so in love with another man before, in a totally none sexual way... no homo
google image searching george stephanopoulos at 1 AM on a saturday night...once again
Have you not heard of Jennifer's supreme lust for William Shatner? She wants to eat Taco Bell off of his love handles
Found her laying down in a booth in iHop. She's a keeper.
Yessssssssss. I got taped to a couch last night apparently. I also thought i was close to scoring after talking to some chick about hard boiled eggs
Where are you and who are these girls passed out on the floor?
and why are they spooning a flamingo?
they traded weed for a spot on our floor. be nice.
Would it be in bad taste to ask Marky Mark to sign the vibrator I named after him?
So much beer in the passenger seat the seatbelt light is blinking
Omg. I felt like a crazed animal last night. My lesbian instincts burned a hole in my panties.
Yeah. I had to take off my shirt. It's soaked in weakness.
My black heart of coal cannot compete with your boiling crock pot of teddy bears, rainbows, 90s music, and the good candy you get from rich people on Halloween.
Im going to be coked out with hello kitty fire arms. Valentines day can suck my dick
Out of curiosity, do you feel happiness for you, or sadness for ME, that you are the only one I drunk text?
I'm so proud of us for not dying.
Amanda, I can 99.9% assure you i'm probably never going to bang your mom
I DON'T LIKE THAT SENTENCE
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