we black-lighted her bedspread and it looked like a jackson pollock painting.
I think they should rename 16 and pregnant to "I was fucked in highschool and all I got was a baby and humiliated infront of the nation on MTV"
Have you come up with a team name for the beer pong tournament on Saturday?
We can be the stepdads. If anyone asks why say because we beat you and you hate us.
I really wish I didn't have to wear pants this is ridiculous
The weird kid in front of me is reading an article titled "why don't i have a girlfriend?" the article then continues to talk about the mathematical equation for obtaining a girlfriend. exhibit a of why he is single
She threw up a whole curly fry. A. WHOLE. CURLY. FRY.
Sitting at a bar next to a guy wearing sunglasses drinking a pitcher by himself and having an argument with himself over if journey is more ballin than kiss. Feel better about myself.
In my defense it was my birthday and I really wanted to do it.
Within 5 minutes of max walking in his pants were off and he was wearing my snow goggles as underwear.
I guess I puked all over my hand too and I just looked at my roommate and said, "fix this."
I wish we couldve been like jesus and the desiples tongith
why is there a fishing net hanging from my ceiling fan?
Woman at starbucks on her computer with a garbage bag of popcorn and a bottle of lotion. Where are you coming from?!
My google history for last night included "Whre is johns house" and "wher can i buy nukes?" Pretty sure they're related to one another.
It must have been good head...he put down the Xbox controller
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