so he went down on me and i thought i heard him say "you're smelly" to my vagina
i got awkward and finally asked him what he said
he actually said "you want some dick?" to my vagina. which is worse? either way he's talking to it
I showed my boss the "She Wolf" video. He sent it to all his friends and told me to make us martinis...thanks Shakira and keep it up
Moms kinda upset I threw up in grandmas bedroom. I think ill stay in tonight.
He's engaged. If the world's smallest penis can find true love than I can too.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I puked in the coffee maker. I wouldn't make coffee tomorrow morning if I were you
We were driving to the party as he was giving me key bumps.. That's what I call team work
i was wearing footie pjs. how could there be confusion as to who i hooked up with, thats not something you forget
I don't know what it is about vodka that make me ruin relationships.
Don't feel sorry for me. I'm getting Red Lobster and sex tonight. Nothing can bring me too far down.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I broke out the Krispy Kreme, and am possibly having random internet sex in less than an hour. I think I got this breakup under control.
I have a sixth sense for dads free balling in gym shorts
There arew tilmes ina man's life when christmaas. THerew are times in a man's lfie when drunk texts from a bathrom hyufgirto. So, you know, merry chriastmans.
It's the first weekend of the school year and I'm already selling stuff for booze. Need a microwave?
I've never been so excited to be bleeding from my vagina.
His penis is average but his stamina is amazing!!! I didn’t know I had that many orgasms in my body!!!!
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