Gonna get hammered and start online dating men in prison. But... only the ones who get out within two years.
Girl's gotta have her standards.
"women exchanges sex for chips" on msnbc
damn even the hoes are getting hit by this economy
i love accidental penises.
we watched a tutorial on how to do guidette makeup
I woke up because I was nodding to the dream question of "would you like a sombrero?"
So when I got her home I realized being a lesbian again isn't like riding a bike...
Yeah I'm gunna date him. I figure its regular sex and maybe feelings will come in time...it worked for arranged marriages...
Come help me clean. I know we won't be getting our security deposit back...but I would like to move out with our dignity.
I don't really see how asking you not to cum on my face or hair makes me high maintenance
I would makeout with my roommate, but im not drunk enough and she doesnt like bacon fat
I don't remember anything past "we have 15 minutes to drink this keg."
Dude, please wake him up, there are pills all over the floor and hes the only one who knows which ones to take simultaneously.
Drunk me cleaned my room for me. Needless to say our relationship has improved greatly
Howd last night go?
well he stumbled in my parents door drunk and then asked my mom if she was my grandma. Id say as far as first impressions go, he failed miserably
LOOK AT HOW SMOOTH THIS BITCH IS
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