Hope the move went well! I'll miss you!
you are a cunt and I hated living with you and your skeezy boyfriend.Just thought I'd get that out there.
The answer to your question is yes. I am wearing a star of david to the bar in order attract a jewish man.
I just saw a kid drop his lollipop on the floor of best buy, kick it because he was pissed off and then pick it up and eat it. I think I have a long lost son.
5 am is for sleeping. Or getting railed on by a stranger. But never for fundraising. Get real.
we just drove by a car that was painted for a grad, it said "you done it!" with a confederate flag bumper sticker next to it. i love kentucky
you tried turning the bar into a spelling b competition last night and every time someone couldn't spell something you would make them chug.
We bought a hamster while completely stoned and 2 hours later returned it because your mother wouldnt let you bring it in her house. You cried. a lot.
after we were done she whispered to my dick "you sir, are a genius"
I guess all those years with her as your babysitter finally paid off.
I THINK I JUST JOINED A GANG. PLEASE PICK ME UP.
Remind me in the morning that I've now seen a guy do crack. That actually happened. I'm at the wrong party.
The only downside to doctor sex is that getting choked with a stethoscope leaves marks.
You know how I know last night was a good night? Because I remember high fiving a couple WHILE they were having sex.
When a guy invites you to dinner and breakfast the next day it's implied that he's going to make some sweet loving in betwixt correct?
The clothing optional portion of the night began around midnight. Then we did disgusting things to each other. It was beautiful.
She said I can't embarrass her, the challenge has been set
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