Any of you guys fuck a 16 year old again? Because our front yard got fucked over high school style.
Im bringing wine tonight. Its from a merlot from nashville. i bet it'll taste like infidelity and teenage pregnancy.
its not a party unless mikie exposes himself
So yeah she lost her virginity in a wheel chair with a broken pelvis. I'm still trying to figure out how I should feel about that.
he does have a point though, watching you drink makes me never want to drink again
My drunk neighbor is arguing with a goose in his yard. This was the highlight of my day.
More cowboy butts than you can shake a stick at, oh joy.
I'm not saying Tijuana was a bad idea, I'm saying that we make poor life choices. And Steve was robbed by the police.
That's the last time I get in a car with six rappers headed to god knows where.
Texas awaits me. And all the cocks that live there too.
You have not lived until you and a ginger miget chick are jumping and waving your arms in a pitch black bathroom to turn on the motion lights. Yes, today I have officially lived.
I'm thinking my boss switched to all cordless keyboards and mouses so that none of us would hang ourselves in the office.
I JUST SENT A TOILET SELFIE TO THE WRONG PERSON.
Completely unrelated and mildly related, a guy I hooked up with last year in a threeway died, his obit photo was his Grindr photo
Note to self, the correct response when a guy tells you he likes you as a person is not "ew"
Randomize
