he thinks he's going to hurt your feelings
He can't hurt my feelings
I don't have feelings.
I just found out my favorite drunk show, Repo Men, is just reenactments. I can't express through words my disappointment.
My porch is a mess of peanut butter and tostitos...thanks for that.
I got my period while he was fingering me , I knew it because I never get that wet.
Did u at least say sorry?
When sleeping with someone new: should you hide the magnum condoms, or let him know what he has to live up to?
I think he thought he was a gentleman because he bought me the most expensive plan b at cvs
she called for a booty call so i sent mike as my stunt double
work has become about six times more interesting since i started fucking my boss.
I woke up at 3am, my head in a toilet, still at the kegger, wearing a random cowboy hat.
Dude, did you really "knight me" and tell me I had permission to bang your sister last night?
He's so hot and there's so much R Kelly and vodka I think I might die.
And as cleavage season comes to a close, so blooms a new season of yoga pants. And the people rejoiced.
I used to put Bugles on my penis and pretend it was a wizard.
Although a guy bought me a shot of fireball last wknd and I told him he wouldn't even get half a handjob for that and walked away so don't tell me I don't have standards
fell down stairs ended up in underground bar now im dancing with trannies and best night of my life. lines of coke
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