Text. Mid BJ. 8 points.
I stayed up for an hour trying to make my room stop spinning and then I realized it was bc my fan was on
its like fishing. just send her some cock shots to keep her on the hook then use tequila to reel her in
i know this sounds kinda weird but his cock smelled like fabric softener. it was so refreshing.
He just called me juicy booty via text message.
Someone at all my grapes... if it was you or one of your hoodrat friends I swear to god I'll shit in your shampoo
We bonded over the fact that we each, separately, got arrested on the same weekend.
I hate him. I fucked every one of his friends AND his fat brother and he still won't break up with me.
I'm proud of you, you were pretty classy last night, you didn't puke AND you didn't take off your shirt, except for those two times in the corner.
Why am I getting texts saying are you ready for this butthole? Help
Went home with a dude from UF last night. Just dripped chicken onto my phone and then licked it off. Going to pick up a bridesmaid dress. Mid 20s in a nutshell.
We fucked like animals on that lion king beanbag chair that your mom got you for your 10th bday
I hope you know, that by sending me a cat meme back, you've entered in a cat picture battle; which never has an end in sight.
The duel has begun.
Did you finish that presentation yet?
No but don’t worry about it. I do my best work in the middle of the night. I’m like a hamster.
He climbed on the counter and announced it was time for something called The Cocktacular and all the girls immediately left. He cockblocked the entire fraternity!
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