i just realized how high i was when i was screaming red light challenge at the top of my lungs and am watching it alone
so he shaved. down there. and before he took his pants off i thought it was hot but then all i could think about were the naked mole rats from 7 grade science class.
If you liked it then you shoulda put your dick in it, oh uh uh oh
i dont care if i have to wear a pillow case, there will be an open bar at my wedding
im at a loss of words.... a stripper is dancing to a Justin Bieber song.
Well hey if hot cowboys are involved then all bets are off.
Ummm so does anybody remember me stopping to get my ear peirced last night and make an earring out of a staple? Or did I just somehow lay on this thing and ram it through my ear?
True that.. I am going to ride a gold plated unicorn across a field of cocaine and coach purses when I graduate.
That was beautiful.
IS SOBER OCTOBER A THING?? WTF WHO ARE THESE PEOPLE?
I've found a new low. I was climb-on-the-bar-piano drunk.
you never know what sharing a kayak could lead to
It's true
It is clearly not my fault that you decided studying was more important than trying to bang our hot teacher for an A, so I seized the opportunity.
sex on a roof was cool and all but that superhero argument was the best part of the night hands down
Her handjob consisted of slapping me in the balls. I am never hooking up with her ever again ever.
Well, I have no idea where my underwear is, so yea I would say it was a good weekend.
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