5 years of college and never once did they teach us how to respond when you overhear a group of 7th grade boys who are in your class talking about how you're definitely DTF
children are so perceptive these days... and horny
don't tell her this, but while we were doing it doggy style I picked up my phone and changed my status to "who let the dogs out"
Hello everyone will one of you please inform me on why I woke up in a cardboard recycle dumpster with no shirt and a stuffed animal? I want to hear this explanation.
Your godly.
i figure i've seen his cum stains on the floor, i'm allowed to say these things.
I literally saw him try to open a beer can with his anus. We need o step up our game.
Who topped off the "random beer mix" beer bong with a pinch of pepper?? All you could taste was busch and pepper...
Lets just say I chased with a burrito.
Are some dicks heavier than others? Random question as I'm feeling mine.
Today's been pretty great, I went and bought the new Batman for the sole purpose of masturbating to Bane
Why is your ex naked in my apartment?
Like who turns down taking a nap inside of someone in 2014.
Bacon and your penis are involved. Of course I'm going over.
Remembering you have vodka in the freezer gives the same surge of happiness as finding 20 bucks in a coat pocket.
look im sitting on my bathroom floor in my underwear snorting cocaine can we talk about this later
I see more hoeing in ur future
Randomize
