Dude, I just had an awesome rave/orgy with like bunch of hot Asian chicks on a cable car. It was like being in a Gwen Stefani video, cept w/o the bad spelling
God, I love San Francisco.
she was a 2....and a legitimate 2. like, helen keller is a 1, this girl...2.
Call me pathetic, but saying "tits for ireland" is working out really well on chatroulette today.
Once you realized you couldn't finish the 30 you started walking down the street and leaving a beer in everyone's mailbox
did you really just refer to me me as an old fashioned penis?
The last thing I remember is ordering two Martinis while yelling 'CAN YOU PUT THAT IN ONE GLASS?'
Yes. Amanda is the only option and I want cake so I can sacrifice my vagina.
No shame December is a go.
Well, my breasts are swollen and I cried about the Iditarod. But I say PMS until proven pregnant.
After sending me a dick pic, he asked, "yay or nay?"
I mean my dick does have feeling again, which is a step in the right direction
never planned on seeing last weekend's one night stand again, much less be on the same plane as him..
Good, I've got all this booze. It's intimidating to be in the room alone with it..
They think I fractured my spine while doing your cousin on concrete.
This is the Front Desk Lady from the Saturolite Inn. Your friend is passed out in the lobby. Please come help her.
I would cock slap so many things if I had a cock.
Randomize
