I think it's safe to say that I made out with the entire msu campus this weekend
Even My mom was ashamed of me bringing her home, she pulled me aside, and told me i can do better than, "butter faces"
I've had enough of this chick, she wanted to cuddle after giving me a handjob. I feel like I'm in junior high
I don't know who he was, where he came from, or where he went, but he just handed me a bowl of mac and cheese and left. It was good too.
I know its been a few months but you must know you hve the 2nd biggest dick I've ever seen. 1st place went to a rapper so don't feel bad.
I hope the walls stop moving before my manager notices that i'm still drunk.
I mean I drunk but not enough to handle a Scientology convention
if any part of your body has ever entered my vagina you are fucking obligated to speak to me if i so desire
Don't make emojis simulating eating me out
i don't know man... i just want to listen to John Lennon every time i finish fucking her. is this love?
I mean, he drove your car and it burst into flames, if anyone cant be trusted, it's him.
you never un-have a 4some
I should know better than to open your texts at the grocery store
I think after tonight I'm 85% lesbian
Hahah I’ve never had someone stop me mid-coitus to tell me how amazing I am. Def ego boost.
Randomize
