Ok pretty sure I just saw Mike O'Malley walking through the parking lot. I wanted to see if I followed him, would he lead me to the acro-criag, i've always wanted a crack at that bitch.
He then proceeded to try to whisper up my nose...
I just ate a cashew that looked EXACTLY like your dick.
Haha he acted like he's never seen a tampon catapolt across the hall before
It's when I'm in my pajamas and in need of a gin delivery that I miss NYC most of all.
It took us hanging out like four times to kiss. Id like to fuck you before I'm 30
If I brought two seashells to Lowe's, do you think that they'd drill two holes in each shell for me? I need to be a mermaid on Saturday...
He was going down on me as I discovered a spaghetti-O on my boob. Its been a while since I faked it.
He tried to give me a shoulder massage while i peed in the neighbors bushes to "make it more relaxing."... I let him... That drunk
the good news is that i vommed the last of my humanity last night.
welcome to the club.
Your ankle brace is here and the saw is charged. Grab some vodka that cast is coming off tonight.
Omg no. We ate a raw pumpkin last nighr. We dipped it in BBQ sauce.
I may be bringing home two guys tonight. I'f they won't go for a double-team you can have the lanky one.
BTW he text me to text him later after the concert to hang out. Im prepping my bed but I should know I shouldn't count my dicks before they hatch
I can guarantee he will smoke me out and I won't feel bad about it because he gets to touch my butt.
Randomize
