i'm in his phone as sushi coochie
Their house warming gift for us was a half case of keystone and getting the cops called..
Everytime the frat boy touches his bro's ass after making a cup take a drink
The drugstore has summer clearance. I bought you a little mermaid bucket. Now your hangovers will feel more like childhood adventures.
That white girl was surprised to see orange pubes around my black cock. Happy Halloween!
the scent of your tears make me crave pizza
I think my body is literally trying to get me to reproduce. "fuck someone! Anyone!" - my body
I wouldn't even cut tickets or put ppl in jail I'd just hand out punches to the mouth and Liam Neeson throat chops
He asked me if my princess crown was real and before I could say yes, he was already reaching to put it on. I'm pretending I'm asleep if he tries to have sex.
It's national "dress up your pet day" come over. Drugs and dressed up cats..it's the shit dreams are made of.
You know it was a good night when visa fraud prevention services are calling
Look, he's a hot korean guy with a motorcycle and a great ass. I'm gonna do head-titingly kinky shit with him.
Our sex from this weekend should be engraved into a plaque or commemorated somehow. It was fucking amazing.
it wasnt weird until his dog watched upclose as i put a tampon in
half way down the stairs my legs said fuck this and i just fell the rest of the way...
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