he said i was weird because i want to have sex in public places.
i dont think thats weird i think thats fun
i forgot to tell you, he fell asleep outside my house again last night, but im weird
Also I just saw on facebook your sister is taking pole dancing lessons. Just a heads up.
drunk pissing on my closed toilet lid is actually quite a sobering experience
Turns out Woolite can get the cum stains out of her moms couch.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
drunk lawn darts. Let's test the homeowners policy
Slutapocalypse this thursday. Invite every freshieee you hooked up with this semester to my house. Think of it like a meet n greet for them and battle of the sluts for us.
is it sad that I can recall my outfits by who took them off?
she got the salsa and pickles out of the fridge looked at me and said what can i make with this
He just told me the blow job I gave him was like a journey
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You were running around drunk in a Toga chasing the frat's Husky. Of course they remember you.
You do realize how pathetic it is when the woman who does your bikini waxes has seen your vagina more than I have
It's getting harder and harder to find People to carry her home
She shouldn't drink
I'm in the fetal position watching the little mermaid and trying not to die. When do you come home?
I woke up in a chipotle parking lot with an industrial sized box of condoms and a bag of dounut holes. I need Jesus
When God closes one door, he opens up a taller, smarter, more successful door, with a bigger cock and nicer teeth.
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