I'm totally gay for Miss Californiaaaaaa
oh sweet, sweet irony
can you blame him?
i blame him for everything, HE GOT ME PREGNANT
I'm driving in the middle of nowhere, and I just saw a stuffed Barney hanging from a noose on a tree. Maybe I should turn around.
I got out of bed with her to go smoke a bowl with her roommate which was fine but I passed out when I went upstairs to take a piss.
Yeah.. she's probably not gonna call.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We need to tone down the drinking before our 7pm class. I don't remember receiving any of these handouts.
I woke up this morning in the house, I didn't realize it was physically possible to duct tape a person to the wall...
OH. MY. GOD. FUCK HIM. JUST GRAB HIM AND FUCK HIM.
i'm sad to say... seems like women around here set up their armageddon booty calls ahead of time. wanna fill all these condoms with tequila and head downtown???
How can I politely yet provocatively ask you for a cock shot?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
5 hours of volunteer work playing with puppies and banned from the frat I hate most as 'punishment'... Besides the ER trip, I'm not seeing the bad in this situation
I think I've had more sex in your bed than you have and I've only been here three days
I FLASHED A GUY AT MCDONALDS FOR A FREE BREAKFAST BURRITO. IT WORKED!
I brought coffee but not enough for the naked guy on your porch
My roommate just angrily told the cat he should have knocked, but that's not lockdown madness. They're always like that.
Because, after all, nothing quite says life in 2020 than doing laundry at 9:40 on a Friday morning to make sure you have masks and underwear.
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