David Carradine died? Should I be thinking about this 10 min before my interview?
Haha just ref him when they ask a questin about kung fu which they will since ur Asian
just left the emergency room. condom extraction.
No stds, not pregs, and lost two pounds. I'd call that a successful two years of grad school.
There's a paramedic out here, what have you done?
He told me something must be wrong, because no one had seen my boobs yet
I remember just enough about last night to wish I didn't remember anything.
when you greet her, try not to lead with "this night will end with you on top of me". first impressions, bro.
Suppose hypothetically u received a request for face time communication with a gentleman who looked astonishingly like a penis. Would you indulge him in conversation? Hypothetically of course.
This is one of those times I wish I had a time machine so I could go back and punch myself in the face to make me realize what I need to do before it's too late
I just read through our messages from yesterday and realized we both referred to me tearing my penis as a good thing. What the fuck.
Just told my shrink " this was a year for whoring around"
There is what appears to be urine on the woman's bathroom sink. I just have so many questions right now.
i just smoked marajunia from a shotgun barrell. what have you done today?
This chick just walked by and pet my beard. Don't know, never talked to her. She just walked by and pet my beard.
Marry her
Happy Father's Day to the first man I called Daddy while cumming.
Randomize
