Five girls, one freshman pledge. We're like our own Make A Wish Foundation.
mid puke you looked up at me and asked if it was your turn to sing
Also, our mothers are placing bets on which of us will get pregnant first.
I am only moving my arms so I remember that I can. These brownies are wild.
I just sat through a State Farm mortgage Insurance commercial to watch a Trick Daddy video. Is this the target audience they are going for here?
she worked me into her spring break cardio plan. im mondays and wednesdays.
You need to get here now. Before they realize I'm not puerto rican.
Well no need to be a stranger, even if you aren't interested in joining my bisexual polygamist marriage. New city, new friends.
This was just another one of those days you wished you had a penis-size indicator instead of wasting your time isn't it?
She's just so happy...and so naked.
If I don't have hickies that last till tuesday, I didn't do this weekend right
My tweets this weekend consisted of me telling every bar I went to that they were my favorite valentine. I've never felt like more of an alcoholic
So wise, so handsome, so good at oral sex.
I'm eating a block of cheese like its a sandwich in the tsa line
you gave me money for the cab and then walked home..
Randomize
